I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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