My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
