is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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