is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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