My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
