How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
