I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
