no. you can't hotbox the world.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
