just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I could fuck to npr.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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