he shaved USA in his pubs
Is it because I queefed?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
