I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize