Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
im six kinds of drunk right now
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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