Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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