he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
