let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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