never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
