That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
