Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
