This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
he laminated a picture of his dick.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
