so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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