Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
