With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize