You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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