Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
