i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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