Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I looked at my own cervix.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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