what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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