WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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