I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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