please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
All I want is dick and wine.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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