Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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