I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
