Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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