she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
