Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Randomize
