I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
