I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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