My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Randomize