my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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