Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
