I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
another moral hangover. fuck.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
He shit in the fireplace
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
