Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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