I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
