i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
