uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Randomize