Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
