She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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