Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
There's even glitter on my cock...
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