he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
