how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
