You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
