Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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